A NARROW ESCAPE by GILLYLEE & VINCENZO RATED FRT

A Mary Sue Parody, or rather, a reoccurring dream I have after reading a Mary Sue story. Story by Vincenzo, written by GillyLee.

It was one of those incredible sunsets. One you would want to remember for the rest of your life. One that changes with every blink of the eye and you cannot tell if what you see now is more beautiful than what you saw a moment ago. Or will see in the next moment.

On a lonely beach, two young men sat together watching the setting sun. The oldest one, a tall man in his early thirties, pulled his knees to his chest and put his chin on those parts of his well-chiselled physique.

"Ouch." He cautiously touched his jaw. "Virg, you've got a deadly left hook, you know that?"

The slightly younger man raised his head and turned to look at his brother.

"Sorry, Scott, I don't know what came over me," he said, massaging the knuckles of his left hand.

"Oh, but you do," said Scott. "It happened to me too."

Virgil sighed. "Faustina Bonaventura."

"Faustina Bonaventura."

"One hell of a pilot, and a good pianist," said Virgil.

"One hell of a pilot," agreed Scott. "And a good field commander."

For a long time both brothers stared at the setting sun.

"I'm glad she's gone," said Virgil, finally breaking the silence. "When you're behind Mobile Control I can anticipate what you'll be doing, well, most of the time anyway."

"I got sick of that highbrow music of hers," said Scott. "And she was always pushing the pod vehicles beyond their capacity. Made me grey before my time. Look at my hair."

Virgil grinned. "I can't," he said and pointed to a black eye marring his handsome face.

Scott smiled apologetically. "Have you noticed that whenever we find a woman on the beach or hiding in one of our birds, something like this happens?"

"Gordon finding the woman he thought was his love of his life, in Dad's bed."

"Alan almost pushing Brains out of the airlock."

"Kyrano attacking John with that meat cleaver."

"Celibacy could be a good thing," said Scott.

"Yeah, right," said Virgil. "Hey, what's that?"

"What's what?"

"There's somebody out there in the water. There, just beyond the breakers."

Scott looked to where Virgil was pointing. "One of Gordon's dolphin friends," he said.

Virgil got to his feet. "Dolphins have no arms to wave with," he said.

Scott sprang up. "Come on," he yelled.

Both men rushed to the water and swam with powerful strokes to the gorgeous woman who was thrashing in the waves.

Her figure was perfect. Her skin was flawless and translucent. She was almost wearing a black swimsuit that did everything to highlight her charms and nothing at all to hide most of them. Scott almost forgot how to swim while he tried to figure out how she had managed to get into it. Her long blonde hair floated around her, entangling Virgil as he wondered how he would get her well-defined curves out of the scanty piece of textile.

The woman opened her violet eyes and gasped, "Thank you, I thought I wasn't going to make it. My name is Misty Waters and my colleagues at the Jet Propulsion Lab were so jealous that they promoted me so soon... and that a Hollywood director asked me to be his leading lady... and..."

Scott shook his head as if he was waking up out of a dream. He and Virgil exchanged glances.

"Hold her arms!" he barked, pushing her head under water.

Virgil wrapped his arms tight around the struggling woman so she couldn't hit them.

"Keep her under," he panted.

The woman was stronger than they had expected, but the two men hung on and soon she stopped struggling.

Scott turned her around and they both pushed her back out to sea.

"That was a close call," said Scott.

"Yup, don't want to go through that again..." agreed Virgil.

"Yeah, we've had our fill of perfect women, haven't we?" said Scott.

"Oh, yes," said Virgil.

And they headed home, where a perfect, but harmless -- since she was their grandmother -- woman had prepared lunch.